November 29, 2013

After The Ultrasound

This isn't so much a reflection as it is a confession.

I cannot lie, after we found out that we were having another girl our reactions weren't exactly made of rainbows and unicorns.

The conversation went like this:
Ultrasound lady: You see this spot right here? (Points at empty space.)
Us: Yes.
Ultrasound lady: See how nothing is there? (Points out empty space again.) This means that it's a girl!
(Pause.)
Me: laughed uncomfortably
Joey: Silence.

After we found out that we were having another baby, we had to get used to that idea. Once we were used to that idea, we started thinking of how cool it would be to have a boy to add to our family. We were mislead and hopeful since my pregnancy this time was nothing like my first pregnancy with Noelle. I was carrying different - lower and rounder, had different cravings, etc. and the baby had a MUCH lower heart rate than Noelle. Even though we tried not to, we got our hopes up for a baby boy. We even started to call him by a boy name, and had Noelle calling the baby that as well.

So naturally, when we found out we were having another GIRL, we had to get used to that idea too. It took us several days to get over our second shock.

I don't want to make us sound ungreatful, because we are. We are so, so blessed that this baby is healthy, and that this pregnancy is going well. All we can ask for is having a healthy, full term, baby. We know this, but it's still hard to deal with disappointment. Not that I won't LOVE this baby with all my heart, but I felt like I had already been here, done that. I already had my precious princess and was ready for a little boy to chase after. I had my baby girl, and was ready for my baby boy.

Now, almost 3 weeks later, I'm seeing things much differently. Life gives you what you need, what you were meant to have. Everything happens for a reason. My baby is my baby! And now? I am SO excited. We are going to have another sweet, beautiful, little girl to cuddle, love, kiss, and spoil!! I am so excited for Noelle to have a little sister to share her life with and Joey and I are going to have another chance to be parents to another princess.

I guess we were meant for more sugar and spice, and that's VERY nice! So excited. Roughly only 15-18 more weeks until we get to meet our second beautiful daughter.

Our girls. (Baby #2 on the left, Noelle on the right.)

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